Sunday, November 30, 2008

How do you know when it's been too long?

It's been too long when you have to RESET your password because you can't remember it anymore. I'm not very good about commenting on other people's blogs and that's because I don't typically sign in. I just jump on, read a bit, and then move to something else. Well it caught up with me tonight because I couldn't remember my password for the life of me! Sad thing is I don't think it's just because it's been a while. I think it's because I have so few brain cells left! My brain is mush. My friends could tell you that and I know my husband would agree. So what do I attribute that to? Is 32 really that old??

Well now that I'm on here, I want to share a few thoughts. My devotional today was perfect and I just praise God for showing me exactly what I needed to see and hear. The scripture was from Philippians 4:6-7. "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." I love that last part, the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension. I know it's no secret to those reading this that I'm heading back to teaching in 5 short weeks. And let me just tell you, the nights are getting very hard. It seems like I can handle it during the day but at night, the tears flow more freely. My throat tightens up, my heart starts pounding, and I just cry. Does that mean I'm not thankful for what is? Of course not, and quite the contrary actually. I've been more thankful this past year than ever before. I'm blissfully aware of the many blessings in my life. And I thank God multiple times each day. So is it wrong that I want more? How could it be wrong to want more time at home with my precious baby? I think the problem is that God is aware that I'm finding myself a tiny bit bitter. Yes, I'm admitting it. Another part of my devotional says, "When tension and anxiety rise up, put them down by naming all the ways God has blessed you and thanking Him. Get your eyes off what you don't have and commit to an attitude of gratitude." So I'm going to refocus my attitude and work hard to stay grateful at all times. Not just most of the time, which I feel like I am. At ALL times. I'm sure I'll slip up as we all do. But this is where you come in. Feel free to help hold me accountable. That's what friends are for, right?

2 comments:

Alyssa said...

We're all here for you!!!!!!!!!!!! I was thinking of you as I drove to work this morning. I miss you can can't wait to see you tomorrow night!

Alyssa said...

And WHY were you up around 1:00 am posting these?!?!?! :-)